From childhood you are seen through the eyes of others. Your parents or caregivers impose onto you their thoughts of who you should be. Society inundates you with ideas of what you should do to gain success and happiness. Pressures of gender roles encapsulate you in predefined life trajectories, defining how you should live your life and what you should prioritize. These become the ideals from which you perceive yourself and these voices become what you believe is your own voice. So you strive to meet these ideals, the version of yourself you should be, the ones you have heard all your life.
However, sometimes something complex happens. On this journey to become this person, sadness may take shape or worries may begin to bloom. The satisfaction you anticipated in achieving goals and becoming this person is not present, and instead you find life heavy, unfulfilling, and relationships unsatisfying.
When one tries to live up to versions of themselves created by others, they are not attending to and cultivating the version of themselves that they want.
In pursuing these ideal versions of ourselves, these illusions, we are left unfulfilled because we can become disconnected from our own voice. So how do we reconnect with our most genuine self? The following blog posts will aid readers in answering the questions “Who am I ?” and “What do I want ?”. It is in exploring these questions that we reconnect with our most genuine self and begin to live a more fulfilling life.
Adaobi Anyeji, Phd
Clinical Psychologist
The Blue Clinic
Specializing in the treatment of sadness, depression, worrying, anxiety
Los Angeles based Private Psychology Practice
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